"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost." ― Martha Graham

A fellow mastermind member once described me as a “midwife who helps women* birth their true selves”. 

I was very moved by this, not only because of the generosity in her observation, but also because it felt true.

Unfortunately, many, if not most of us, have not been taught or encouraged to be our true selves. Even if we have, with time it often gets lost as life happens, such as peer, financial, family or other pressures and responsibilities. When we lose connection to ourselves, it is easy to get bored, frustrated and even feelings of despair may emerge.

* We were in a group of women at the time, but of course, I can help anyone regardless of gender!

Earlier this year, I had the privilege to participate in a mastermind and be personally coached by the inspiring entrepreneur and author Jessica Huie. A native Londoner, Jessica has been speaking and writing about how to find purpose, a topic I am also very passionate about, for many years now. As she is also an experienced publicist, I had attended a few of her talks directed at small businesses since I started my practice in 2016. Finally, this year the stars aligned for the opportunity to work directly with her to become a reality.

We spent a couple of days together in west London with other impressive writers, healers, coaches and entrepreneurs, as I anxiously waited for her feedback on how I could make my work known to more people.

“Dina, why do you hardly mention you use Reiki in your work?”

Your purpose in life is to be YOU.

That’s it.

Everything else will flow from there. When you allow yourself to live authentically, moment by moment, you will begin to discover a more rewarding existence and help create the circumstances for more of these gratifying experiences to emerge.

When you practice being your true self, at every moment possible, you will build a life that is meaningful for you. I choose the word practice because the context of your life may be asking for something different, so it becomes a practice to take action from a place of inner truth rather than from a place of external pressure or societal expectation.

The key to embracing your purpose may sound simple, but the path is not necessarily easy.

We are living in a new world, a new reality. We are no longer who we were two years ago.

If you are reading this, you have now experienced a global pandemic, the impact of which cannot be understated. As much as we’d like to return to normal, we have already changed. We have been changed by circumstances, so normal may not look and feel the same anymore. We are viewing our reality through a new lens and many of us are feeling called to new things. Maybe a whole new life.

However, sometimes even just starting a small, new project from scratch takes courage.

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable." Helen Keller

Change is ever present. It is all around us and often unpredictable. Yet, we tend to relate to life as though events, or decisions made, should be permanent. We may crave a feeling of stability or invariability, even when we know it is an illusion. As much as we’d like for things to remain the same in order to predict outcomes, the only true constant in life IS change. Nothing in life is certain. Nothing in life is guaranteed.

This is also true for careers. I genuinely believe the word ‘career’ is outdated and regimented. The word implies a linear path of progression, generally within the same field, until retirement. Nowadays, more and more, this is no longer the reality. The idea of a job for life has disintegrated and the concept of a career for life is slowly becoming more of an option than a given. Choosing a different path when the one we are on is no longer satisfying, is not only more attainable, but in many cases, highly advantageous.

We are indoors again. This time it’s winter, so with less time in the garden or by the river, I find myself looking for interesting documentaries to watch. I was pleasantly surprised to run across one that reminded me of a movement I’ve always been interested in and curious about: Minimalism.

I’ve written about Marie Kondo before and her method of decluttering by letting go of items that no longer spark joy. Minimalism goes above and beyond that.

It is about getting rid of the material possessions we have in excess, but it is also about mindfully simplifying our lives in order to make space for what truly matters to us.

I got curious recently about the ways achievement and fulfilment are traditionally defined, so I looked them up in a few sources. The results were interesting and, for contrast, I chose to share Collins dictionary’s definitions here:

“An achievement is something which someone has succeeded in doing, especially after a lot of effort.”

“Fulfilment is a feeling of satisfaction that you get from doing or achieving something, especially something useful.”

I generally don’t believe these two words are mutually exclusive, but they can be. After the calendar year we’ve had, I know many of us are re-evaluating if the efforts and sacrifices we put into our current careers are worth it.

How are you today?

To begin with, I would like to acknowledge how you may be feeling at this time.

If this pandemic has impacted your health, relationships or finances, or that of those close to you, in such a way that your primary focus is on healing and recovery, my heart and my thoughts are with you.

For those of us who are managing to continue our day-to-day, trying to balance our emotions with the wish to make the best of this time at home, whether it is sharing more of ourselves with family, learning something new, focusing on delayed projects or looking for a new job, the uncertainty that lies ahead makes it all extra challenging to pursue.

How do we plan when we don’t know what the world will look like? 

I LOVE books.

Having been born before the Internet gave us access to information at the click of a button, books have been my gateway to knowledge since the moment I learned to read. Books patiently shared their stories with me and presented information I may not have had access to otherwise. As a Spanish-speaking girl starting middle school in the US, countless hours spent at the nearby library quickly helped me bring my English up to speed to minimise being made fun of. As a teenager, I could read all I wanted to about existentialism when it wasn’t being taught at school and look up astrological signs of people I cared about to gain a better understanding of them. Books have given me a certain kind of freedom and I love them for it.

Books have been such a source of support, that for years I thought they held the key to figure out my ideal career and how to make it happen.

It is February, but as this is my first blog of the year, I would like to extend my best wishes to you and many, many blessings for the year ahead.

At the end of last year, I asked my readers to complete a short survey where they could share their biggest fears and frustrations about changing careers and I promised to address these in my next blog post.

Unsurprisingly, most answers touched upon finances.  Mainly:

·         Fear of not earning enough money

·         Lack of steady income from starting your own business

On Nike’s website, their mission statement is stated as:

“To bring inspiration and innovation to every athlete in the world.

If you have a body, you are an athlete.”

It made me think of how I could say something similar in my work. This is part of what came up:

If you have a passion, you can make an impact.

And we all have a passion.

If you have been quietly wishing for a career change, you may have had thoughts like this:

“There must be something wrong with me for feeling restless in a good job like this one. Why can’t I be content with just staying put?”

Unless you come from a highly entrepreneurial or adventurous family, you may have an underlying belief that there is something admirable in not shaking things up. For those of us that have followed more traditional career paths, the moment we start to consider breaking out of the mould and doing something different, especially mid-career, we start to feel embarrassed, perhaps even guilty, for wanting to follow a career that is more exciting and meaningful to us.

I was asked this question recently at a networking event:  “Are you really happier after changing careers?”

The quick answers is YES!! I am not just happier, but some days I am literally high from the joy that comes from doing exactly what I always wanted to do. From feeling that I have made a difference in someone’s perception of themselves and what’s possible for them. From knowing that I have contributed positively to someone’s life in the best way I know how.When you do work you absolutely love, work you know you were born to do, it flows rather effortlessly.

You’re in a great job. You make good money. You may even work flexibly, for example four days a week or from home on Fridays. People are interested when you tell them what you do at dinner parties. You take Instagram-worthy vacations and live a pretty healthy lifestyle, despite the lavish dinners and social events with friends.

However, you feel like you put on a mask every morning when you go to work and are working and living life on the surface. You touch upon moments that make you truly happy and are fulfilling, but they are few and far between.

“I would love to know what my biggest strengths are, what I’m great at and how to make a successful career of it.”

This is a very common request I get when I first speak to someone thinking of changing careers.  And my answer always is: “Yes, we will absolutely look at that!” 

Another one is:

“This is what I’ve done up to now, what my current role and responsibilities are and I’d like to know where to go from here as I am no longer excited about the work I’m doing.”

Knowing our biggest strengths, past work experiences and present work circumstances are all, of course, part of the puzzle we put together to look at what could be the next step in our careers.  It is all relevant and valuable, but to overcome feelings of restlessness and to satisfy the yearning to have a more exciting career, we need to know more.  We need to dig deeper.

"Do something you really love," she said of her best career advice. "It doesn't matter what it is: being a mom, teaching, whatever you love. If you love it, it'll get you through the hard times, and if you don't, it's not authentic or real anyway. When you love something, every day goes by in 10 minutes."

Does this sound familiar? This quote* is from the internationally renowned Vera Wang, who became an independent bridal wear designer at age 40, after 17 years as an editor at Vogue and a short stint at Ralph Lauren.

I wanted to highlight this topic because I often feel the sense of defeat and hopelessness in people I talk to who have been in the job market for a while.

Not following a single career trajectory is a topic close to my heart, as I have enjoyed learning and working as a teacher, researcher, consultant, recruiter and now life coach and Reiki practitioner. Yet, I admit that whenever I changed jobs, I would get a little bit embarrassed when I shared the news with others. I felt I was presenting myself as inconsistent or unreliable, even lacking ambition by not sticking to one single career path and aim for the most senior levels.

Being the #doworkyoulove activist I consider myself to be :-) , I give talks whenever possible to encourage people who are unhappy in their jobs to consider other options for earning a living.  Career change is a broad topic to speak about, as the circumstances will be different for each individual. In order to keep things simple, I try to address the main areas of concern for career changers, such as time, training, cost and direction, in a 45 minute presentation with Q&A at the end.

It was during one Q&A that someone raised their hand and asked: “What about the biggest obstacle to career change of all...FEAR?”

It was during my coaching training, when my coach asked me “When will you stop giving all your energy to somebody else’s dream instead of yours?” that it clicked.  I had been dreaming about a career change for years, but I had not made it a priority in my life.

December has arrived. For some of us it is "Where has the year gone?" but for others it is a time of year to look forward to with much longing. It is a time where it is generally acceptable to take time off work, with the exception of some professions of course.

Not so many years ago, as Decembers started to get closer, I remember the feeling of exhaustion creeping up on me when I used to be in a job I wasn't satisfied with.